These are all the responsibilities or as Ezykiel says his "kuleanas."
we talked about it to decide what exactly should earn a star on the
chart to figure out what chores are fair. They are not set chores
though, for instance we've phased out "wiping own butt" bc it is now
simply an expectation. And we also agreed that you should be able to
earn a star for the chore every day....so he can earn bonus stars for
other things like helping me clean the car, helping with dishes or
trying a new food (I have the world's pickiest eater.
The thing is though I don't nag him to do any of it. (Except taking meds which needs to be done without complaint) It's his choice to earn the star or not. The quickest he can fill the chart is a week but he realistically average two. A full chart is worth $10 to do whatever he wants with. He can get a toy or save it for something bigger. Right now he's saving for a big transformers set that's $60 so far he's earned $40.
Although I don't keep junk food in my house, he is also free to use HIS money to buy a big ass bag of Cheetos or whatever.
For me it just teaches him accountability. We rarely buy him toys "just because" so he understands the concept of earning money for treats. It also teaches him a very basic form of money management.
The last rule when he does get something tangible though is that for every toy that comes in something needs to go out. So he decides what he's ready to donate and we go and pick out whatever it is he wants
It also teaches natural consequences....if you want something you need to put in the effort and earn it. We as parents happily provide for all of their needs and they realistically want for very little but the small things that are purely wants are earned
The thing is though I don't nag him to do any of it. (Except taking meds which needs to be done without complaint) It's his choice to earn the star or not. The quickest he can fill the chart is a week but he realistically average two. A full chart is worth $10 to do whatever he wants with. He can get a toy or save it for something bigger. Right now he's saving for a big transformers set that's $60 so far he's earned $40.
Although I don't keep junk food in my house, he is also free to use HIS money to buy a big ass bag of Cheetos or whatever.
For me it just teaches him accountability. We rarely buy him toys "just because" so he understands the concept of earning money for treats. It also teaches him a very basic form of money management.
The last rule when he does get something tangible though is that for every toy that comes in something needs to go out. So he decides what he's ready to donate and we go and pick out whatever it is he wants
It also teaches natural consequences....if you want something you need to put in the effort and earn it. We as parents happily provide for all of their needs and they realistically want for very little but the small things that are purely wants are earned
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